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Advice You Can T Afford To
Miss.Contrary to most
conventional wisdom, it°s not your looks, your money, your
job or even your luck, that's going to land you that great
relationship, and keep it sizzling. No, the secret is all
in your attitude.
Here are my Six Essential Secrets For "Flowing"
Relationships
1. Stop competing with each other! Good relationships are
all about being on the same side. What's the purpose in scoring
all those points? Sure you may cross the finish line first
today, and maybe tomorrow as well. But you'll be all alone when
you do, and if you carry on this way, eventually you may not
have anyone left in your life to compete with! So stop
competing; stop player-hating; start concentrating on crossing
that finish line as part of a winning team.
2. Listen, communicate and hear! One of my favorite parts
of my great relationship period, is to sit and chat with my
wife. We talk about big stuff, and small stuff; share plans and
pains, and each of us engages with what the other is saying. We
never use silence as a weapon, and we never go to bed mad.
Master the simple art of real conversation, and your
relationship is halfway home!
3. Understand a relationship is not about "ownership.
"This is probably the most common personal problem I come
across. Possessiveness and jealousy are two of the most
destructive of all human forces. Very few relationships will
survive the poison of this twin-horned devil. Let it go!
4. Pay yourself first every day! The most important
relationship of all is the one you have with yourself! That
means taking care of your body, mind and spirit every single
day. It's simply called self-respect. I can guarantee you, that
if you don't care for yourself, then few others will. Why
should they? If you've already demonstrated your own low
self-esteem, who am I, or anyone else, to argue with that? Take
care of yourself first each day, in order to be strong enough
to take care of the people you care about.
5. Put the romance back! You just can't beat it. A
romantic gesture says: "At this moment, I am thinking 100% of
you, and your needs, and I want to do everything I can to
please you." It also says a great deal about your own
self-esteem. You'd be amazed how many people are motivated to
make romantic gestures because of the praise they'll receive,
not the pleasure they'll give. That isn't romance, its selfish.
Learn to discern. Become a Master of Romance. It'll spice up
your life!
6. Learn how to bend, but never so far that you snap.
Relationships are all about give and take. It's OK to bend with
the wind sometimes. That's the nature of the dance. But it's
not OK to bow over so far, so often, and so low, that you get
worn down, weaken and snap. Learn how much to give, how much to
take, and when to walk away.
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