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Great Conversation
Starters
And Finishers, Part ITo begin
with, allow me to do my part in dissipating an axiom that's
time has come and gone. Discussing politics, religion, and sex
is no longer the faux pas it once was. This is not to say that
you should zero in on these subjects for your discussion
fodder, but you don't have to be afraid to delve into any one
of them.
Discussing politics, in case you haven't noticed, is pretty
depressing. Perhaps reason enough to approach this conversation
topic gingerly. Religion? While there are many great
conversations to be had in this vein, there are not many people
who are willing to discuss the material objectively and with an
open mind. And finally, unless you have a specific issue within
the sex realm, such as the prurient content of the Internet or
television, it's not a good 'casual' topic.
We live in the age of global human communications. You can have
a pen pal in London, and converse (in writing) almost in
real-time over the Internet. Just a few years ago, it took days
for a letter to get to London. Phone calls to Brazil cost a
fraction of what they did a few years ago – and you can make
such a call from anywhere – using your cell phone! In spite of
this communications boon, we humans are becoming less
proficient at actually communicating – both in writing and in
conversation.
Here are some great topics to get some really interesting
conversations started with people you meet at the office,
socially, or when dating. Start a genuinely interesting
conversation and watch people gather around.
There are two rules for casual conversation: 1) Never get
personal, and 2) make sure of any facts.
Topic #1 - Misinformation
Some misinformation lasts a brief time, such as news stories
that get fouled up, and broadcast before the facts are
verified. Some is carried on over time by legend or habit. And
some is perpetuated simply by repetition.
An excellent example of repetition (and faulty news reporting)
can be seen in the case of Robert Fulton (November 14, 1765 –
February 24, 1815). Mr. Fulton did NOT invent the steam engine,
nor did he sail down any river on a boat called the Clermont.
The name of the vessel Fulton rode on was called the North
River Steamboat, and Clermont was the name of a town on the
riverway to the Hudson. When the North River Steamboat stopped
in Clermont, a reporter apparently wired the story of Fulton's
progress to his New York newspaper, where editors made errors
that are now replete throughout literature and solid reference
materials, including encyclopedias.
An example of myth or legend perpetuating misinformation is
found in our daily use of the expressions "The sun is coming
up" and "the sun is going down." This was said when people
believed the Earth was the center of the universe, and the sun
went around the Earth. We've known for hundreds of years that
this is not what actually happens, and yet we continue to say
it the same way.
Topic #2 – Illusion of Numbers
We can't really understand numbers, per se. In order for us
poor humans to understand things, we have to be able to 'wrap
our brains around them.' If I say any numbers 7 or below,
you've got a good chance of 'understanding' what I mean. You
can actually 'see' 6 things in your mind. Certainly you can see
2 or 3. But what about 30? Or 172? And what about more serious
numbers, like the cost of a house: 250,000 dollars? How much is
that?
The above phenomenon is why we all like it so much when numbers
are expressed in ways we can better grasp. Ross Perot did a
superb job of breaking numbers down to where people had a
better chance of understanding them. When I say that the annual
interest on the national debt is 75,000,000,000 dollars
($75-billion) – you haven't a prayer of understanding it. If I
say it is enough money for every man and woman living west of
the Mississippi to get a brand new car, you get a slightly
improved grasp, even if you don't fully fathom it.
The fact is, while numbers are absolute, we can't really
identify with them beyond the ones under ten. Once we reach a
certain point, we start to use other words to describe things.
The interest on the national debt, for example, might simply be
called "huge" or "giganticamundo!" Giganticamundo is about as
effective at conveying the number 75,000,000,000 as 75-billion
is. In neither instance will the listener actually understand
the number used.
Topic #3 – Ethical Broadcast Standards
What should people be allowed to say or show on television?
Just recently, the FCC fines for showing something
objectionable were increased by ten times! But what,
considering our rights of free speech, should be considered
'objectionable?' This is a great conversation topic, and one
that can generate hours of interesting discussion.
In the 1960's there was a very popular TV show called I Dream
of Jeannie. It was about an Air Force officer who finds a
bottle with a lovely Genie in it. One of the two stars of the
show, Barbara Eden, frequently wore her Genie outfit. Network
officials were careful to ensure that the then sexy outfit
covered Miss Eden's belly button. Today, on any morning of the
week, you can turn the television on to watch a workout show
and see several VERY scantily-clad girls freely perspiring as
they gyrate on the beach. And many swimwear competitions in
beauty contests would have been banned thirty years ago.
The point is, what's suitable, objectionable, and acceptable?
Times change, as do people and the morality of cultures. Are we
really still at a point where we should slowly release things
to the media for their discretionary use? Haven't we evolved
far enough along to decide, as individuals, whether we want to
see or hear something? Should it be the right of government to
control broadcast standards, or should it be ours?
These three topics should make starting conversations much
easier for you, and should also make your conversations
eminently more interesting and popular than discussing the
weather or sports scores. Look for more great topics in Part
II. And remember, interesting conversations attract positive
attention.
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