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Ukrainian Marriage Agency Why
Are The Russian
Girls Looking For A Husband Abroad
A Yahoo search for a "Ukraine marriage agency" yields over
1,250,000 results. Let us be frank: these are the surprising
results for an FSU country. Ukraine was locked away from the
rest of the world for a long period of time and has finally
gained its independence 16 years ago, opening great
prospectives to cooperation with foreign counties. Ukraine is
still a young country, so any way this effect is unexpected.
What is the reason for this business to flourish in the FSU
countries within the last few years? Are women of these
countries hunting rich husbands? Are they raking around for an
unforgettable short-term romance? Or do they just want
something more profound like true love relationships and
someone to make them happy?
Lucky for me, when these questions began swarming in my head, a
good girlfriend of mine, who has lived in Italy for a number of
years, was in town to visit her family. So, instead of digging
through piles of statistics and wracking my brain to get the
information so interesting for me, I contacted her and loaded
her brain with all the questions.
Before I move on, let me make myself clear: by no means does
this article include motives and wants of every Ukrainian
woman, who submits her profile to a marriage agency. Moreover I
will be the one to inspire the foreigners: do exercise caution
once you chose the path of a marriage agency search. In the
past, some Russian ladies from the FSU countries have provided
more than enough negative publicity (read my article on scams
in Lugansk city, Ukraine), but don't let that discourage you
and miss out on a chance to gift someone the pleasure of
communication and a possibility to find. With that in mind, I
proceed…
When I began questioning the motives of Russian women who take
a chance on marriage agencies, my first discovery was quite
disturbing. One of the top reasons why the FSU women prefer
foreigners is that the men at their home country… aren't good
enough. There are a lot of bad stories about the life of
Russian girls in foreign countries. Why not admit that the
reason is in those men at home, who, in my opinion, don't know
what a family is?" - said Natasha commenting on the article in
one of the leading Russian papers, which blamed marriages to
the foreigners. "Unfortunately, the 'Russian' men have got a
long way to go to keep up with the men from abroad." Some
bridal agencies will give you the same information. An American
journalist, who took a "Romance tour to find a Russian bride"
trip to Ukraine as a part of his investigation for a story,
says in his on-line journal that the instructor on the tour
explained to him: Ukrainian and Russian men "drink, philander,
alternately beat and neglect women."
Obviously, not every FSU man treats women this way.
Nevertheless, a general conception that most brides/Ukrainian
women share of the men in their home countries comes down to a
few common words: irresponsible, hard-hearted, too demanding
and not willing to provide for their children, let alone their
mother. Throughout history Russian women have been famous for
the way they treated their family. They are loving, devoted and
caring, and, coming to a marriage agency they dream to find
someone like themselves to create a strong happy family.
The other thing noticed by Natasha during her three-year-long
marriage to a foreigner: To tell you the truth, marrying him I
didn't think about living in Italy... But for Italians the
family is very-very important and they put a great emphasis on
the family values. That meant a lot to me. Foreigners in
general seem to be more serious about family and children,
unlike the men at home."
In line with a lack of quality of the FSU men, there is also a
lack of quantity. Statistics show that during 2002 the ratio
men-women was 46 , and hasn't changed much since. Given that a
large part of these 46% are people who can't be counted on for
love, care and support, it leaves the ladies of Russia and
Ukraine very little to chose from. Of course the solution to
the problem is broading your horizons.
"All the good ones have been snatched away long ago, your
chances to find someone in this country after you turn 25 are
next to nil," Natasha mused over a cup of coffee (she married
her Italian sweetheart at the age of 29). "It seems the guys
(in Ukraine) disappear when they turn 30."
On the top of all said, the appreciation of their own
femininity sets the FSU women apart from American or European
ladies. Most foreigners note that the FSU women look different
from the latter two, and I don't mean just their outward
beauty, which has been mentioned and admired by many. These
ladies like to look pretty, it is not unusual for them to wear
a dress and pumps on a regular basis, they care about their
body and like to be attractive. Bottom line, they want to be
feminine, not feminist.
FSU women cherish being a "weak gender", which for them means
taking care of their family in the first place, as well as
being cared for and appreciated. Promises of that seem to be
given in abundance by Americans and Europeans, many of whom
share an opinion that it has been too long since Western women
have shown any aspiration to cherish the softer side of the
"weaker gender". In comparison with a constant rush of the
women at home to make careers and get equal with men, the
feminine side of the FSU ladies is at definite advantage to the
men from abroad. Even some FSU men will admit that "their"
women are attractive to the foreigners exactly because they
"remain women, not some emancipated feminists, like in the
West".
Natasha dreamily remembers her very first visitings Italy:
"When I was in Italy I was treated like a princess surrounded
with attention, that I missed so much from our men. I think
there is so much beauty (in Russia), that our men are simply
used to it, it is mundane to them, they forget about simple
compliments… Italians value beauty."
After all this, what can I say to the men in search of their
destiny? It all comes down to what you are looking for. No
doubt, there will be some money-hungry vamps, eager to trap
you. If you want an exotic one night stand, you can find that
in Ukraine, Russia or anywhere in the world for that matter.
But there are no better places than Russia and Ukraine if you
want to find a respectful, caring and loving woman who will
cherish your family.
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